Good afternoon, House of Madness tenants:
When it comes to trust, you can never underestimate its value. Having a good mechanic when your car starts to make sounds resembling a combination of squealing banshees and something that can only be described as inanimate suffering is great, but if he or she starts busting out terms and diagnoses which require you to be a genius to understand as the estimated repairs soar past the four figure mark, it may be high time you bring your vehicle to someone that not only operates in the daytime, but doesn't have a strict 'Cash Only' policy taped to an empty beer case. When investing your hard earned dollars with someone in hopes of maximizing your future return, it's probably best to go with the person boasting a proven track record of paying dividends to their clients, rather than the guy working out of the laundromat wearing enough jewelry to not only impress Mr. T, but make you question whether the actor formerly known as 'Clubber Lang' was indeed mugged before your arrival. I'd certainly rather have a family doctor I'm comfortable confiding in, and if I have an issue in an awkward area or orifice, I want the doc that treats me with discretion and concern, rather than the one making balloon animals out of rubber gloves before invading my anal cavity with the delicacy of a triceratops. Trust is key indeed, and when it comes to horror, there's no one I trust more than one Mr. Ari Aster.
If "Hereditary" (2018) hadn't been enough to blast my cock off (it was, and I found it-thank you), 2019's "Midsommar" surely lit the fuse and blasted my parts into uncharted territories where they could only be found with extensive searching by trained professionals (they were, thanks again for your concern). Both films terrorized chambers of my mind that had previously been hibernating, just waiting for someone or something to come along and scare them from their slumber. Not only was my mind awakened with horror, but it also seemed to be satisfied via sensation only previously attainable with a back scratcher or the long fingernails of an intimate partner. Yes, both films were that fucking good; so much so that I remember leaving the theater after watching "Midsommar" all by my lonesome, and calling my buddy just because I felt like I needed to share my appreciation for said film with someone else, and I couldn't wait to do so.
Not a whole lot is known about Ari Aster's latest project "Beau is Afraid", which is due to hit theaters April 21st, 2023, but the little snippets I've been able to gather describe it as being a horrific tale spanning several decades in an alternate universe, where a neurotic man's (Joaquin Phoenix) fraught relationship with his mother ends upon her death, and he must travel home and deal with some supernatural threats. At this point in time, Ari Aster could make a movie about emojis, and I'd pay my hard earned money to...."What do you mean there's already an Emoji movie!?" If what my son has just told me is true, then perhaps Hollywood really is running out of good ideas, but I can practically guarantee Ari Aster isn't.......I trust him to the fullest.
Check out the trailer for "Beau is Afraid" here.
NB
