The Wolf of Snow Hollow (2020)

Good afternoon, House of Madness beasts:

When it comes to mythical creatures, there are plenty to choose from when deciding how to spend your time trying to be scared, but with such overwhelming choice, it's an ever revolving door in a sick game of 'survival of the fittest'. Horrific creatures come and go, but once their 15 minutes are up, we're ready to cast them aside and dare a new someone or something to scare us more. However, sometimes the familiar stories of old containing beasts, madmen, and ghouls alike make for an exciting new tale if the telling is proper. As saturated as some elements of horror have become, where would we be without a good vampire adventure? A world devoid of zombies, just because the concept has been done to death in your mind? I know for a fact that if everyone stopped making movies about werewolves, a great buddy of mine would sleep a lot sounder at night, and that's no joke. As much as we demand new monsters, apparitions, demented abnormalities, and sadistic lunatics, there's always a magnetic appeal to the tales of old. Just because a scare is old in age, doesn't necessarily equate to it being old with the tricks and treats. Does "The Wolf of Snow Hollow" bring an old tale new life? Not entirely, but it definitely has a pulse.

Snow Hollow is a small mountain town, and the only criminal activity it's accustomed to is jaywalking during a snowstorm. I'm not making light of jaywalking or snowstorms, so unbunch your panties and let's get back to the story. Snow Hollow basically runs itself; most are blue collar workers spending their lunch hours at the diner, and their evenings at the bar, while the rest enjoy simple life in the tranquility of nature. Until dead bodies start showing up after full moons, and they're not just dead, they're mutilated and dismembered into gory goop. The evidence points to a wild animal of some sort, but Officer John Marshall (Jim Cummings) has his own theories, and people need to listen to him, or he'll scream overtop of you until you finally give in. With the murders happening, there's definitely no mystery as to why Marshall's marriage failed, and his daughter Jenna (Chloe East) treats him like the unavailable alcoholic he is, and has been her entire life. Marshall's father is Sheriff Hadley (Robert Forster-RIP), and he isn't well, which further complicates things as Marshall tries to balance alcohol abuse, his daughter, and now an ailing father to go with a town under siege by someone (or something) unfathomable.

As the body count rises, so do the town's panic levels, and the feelings of resentment toward their police department are at undeniably catastrophic levels. Marshall may be the son of a Sheriff who thinks he's next in line, but he displays the leadership skills and qualities of an orangutan flinging shit at a zoo patron, while he screams 'GOTCHA' in hopes of getting a few cheap laughs. Even when alcohol isn't a factor, Marshall is a tightly wound stick of dynamite waiting to be lit, and he's running with a half-inch fuse. Luckily for Snow Hollow, they have Detective Julia Robson (Riki Lindhome), who may get treated by her colleagues and peers as incompetent, but is the only person on the force other than the Sheriff with an ounce of intuition. Who's actually running this shitshow, a Sheriff that's at least ten years past retirement, his son who couldn't run a faucet, or the rest of the force that seems to run on coffee and jokes about rampant flatulence? Someone needs to take charge, and fast.

No matter how much Marshall argues, all the evidence is pointing at an animal of some sort, more than likely a wolf and not a bear as originally thought. Marshall is on high alert, but not only does he have to disprove this whole bear/wolf/werewolf thing, his most important and toughest foe will be himself, and all the mistakes that have built him into the peculiar, eccentric, and bad decision making man he has allowed himself to become. If he can't save himself, how can he be expected to save an entire town?

"The Wolf of Snow Hollow" is at times gory, funny, tense, and all of these things combined, and although it doesn't take itself too seriously, I still would have preferred if Marshall had been played a little more on the straight, instead of an over the top cartoon character that was certainly at times fun to watch, but ultimately didn't resonate with anything remotely close to a real human being. Well shit, here I am complaining about an unrealistic human, when not ten minutes ago I was praising vampires and zombies. Maybe it's just me. 

"The Wolf of Snow Hollow" is now streaming on Shudder.

Madness Meter: 5.9/10

NB